Cat Piano

German psychiatrist Johann Chrstian Reil gave this world many things. For instance, he coined the phrase "psychiatry." He also gave us the cat piano.

This is every bit as terrifying as it sounds.

You see, Reil practiced a rather unorthodox method of psychiatry. He focused on scaring, harming, or just generally weirding out his patients in hopes that the traumatizing experience would bring them into a state of consciously where they would think more clearly and rationally. Which brings us to the cat piano.

Pictured: science.

Reil called it the Katzenklavier, and it is a literal cat piano. The unlucky cats involved in the experiment's tails were fasted under the hammers of the piano keys; so when one hit a key a corresponding cat would let out a dolorous melody.

Oddly enough, patients treated with the cat piano saw no significant progress in their mental illnesses.   They were also never able to look a cat in the eye again.

Agent 008 *HowToWriteABlogWhileStudyingForPhysics*

The following post is based around the entirely fact-based publication "CPM Algebra II Connections" (2007) by Judith Kysh. 

So if you are not familiar with The Case of the Cooling Corpse, firstly, I pity you. Secondly, fortunately for you, it can be found at this site: http://www.cpm.org/pdfs/information/conference/A2C_Problem_Solving_Reasoning_Logarithms.pdf
It's problem number 25 (you have to scroll down the page a little).

The wholly innocent idea of the story is to get kids to learn how to solve algorithms. However, Judith goes around doing this in the best possible way: a murder mystery.

If you didn't bother to read the link in the description, too bad. I'm not going to summarize the plot for you. Let's just say it involves a character named "Dr. Dedman", and a slight necrophilic sub-theme. And the main-cop-detective-agent character is named 008. Isn't that just the best.

Sadly, I cannot find a copy of the artwork for this particular problem. Your'e really missing out though. It looks like it was drawn by a gerbil having an epileptic seizure.

Here's a conclusion someone took the time to write to the saga:
http://207.62.24.5/prhs/jsteaffens/2007%20Student%20Work/Cooling%20Corpse%20Website/home/answer.html

Anyway, the point behind this post was that if I had to be inflicted with The Case of the Cooling Corpse, then everyone should be.

And if you didn't read the links I graciously provided to you; congratulations. You won.

The Jesus Family!

I have three questions for you.

First, what would the most holy family sitcom involve?

Answer: Jesus, obviously. (And possibly a sieve). 

Second, did you know that Jesus had at least four brothers and multiple sisters?

Answer: "Why of course I did! Because I am incredibly well-versed in scripture! I know they are mentioned in Mark 6:3 (Is this not the carpenter, the son of Mary, the brother of James, and Joses, and of Juda, and Simon? And they were offended at him) AND also referenced in Matthew 13:55-56 (Is not this the carpenter's son? is not his mother called Mary? and his brethren, James, and Joses, and Simon, and Juda? And his sisters, are they not all with us? Whence then hath this man all these things?)."

Third and finally, do you see where I'm going with this?

Answer: "O beloved author of this incredibly fascinating blog, please take all of my money so that you can produce a family sitcom centered around Jesus and his numerous siblings!" 

Kanye West will star as the big JC himself. 

Isn't it perfect? Imagine your church crowded onto a sofa watching on a giant TV (the giant TV could be funded by the church's tax right-off) as Jesus with his brothers and sisters getting into whacky shenanigans, having petty arguments, fighting over girls/boys (maybe jesus is gay?), and sharing wonderful heartwarming moments of togetherness?

Some people think that Jesus' siblings were Joseph's from a past relationship. The show could incorporate that also; possibly a son/stepdad struggle? Either way, it would be great fun for the whole family.

And if the show does well enough, grab your crucifix and popcorn in time to catch the sister show: Jesus: High School Years.

Revenge Rape

*Mkay guys, we're all adults here. Rape is bad. I fervently hope that this is not knew knowledge to you, but just incase it is, don't say I didn't warn you. Well, I guess I haven't technically warned you yet. Bottom line here people, don't do rape. Unless you're the guy you are about to hear about. (Seriously people, rape is bad).*

A disclaimer brought to you by the USDA

So once upon a time (2009), an Azerbaijani man tracked down his son's rapist. Then revenge raped him. While recording it on a camera phone. Then proceeded to distribute the footage around the Azeri capital. Which, incidentally, is how the city police learned about this act of rather unorthodox vigilantism.

Now, both the parties are incarcerated and facing charges of "sexual offenses against minors" (the rapist was only 17) and "sexual offense conducted with prior collusion."

The moral of the story is that rape is bad.